Minding Your Own: 3 Ways to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others

Whether you’re working your way through the entrepreneur world or climbing the corporate ladder, it’s easy to find yourself caught up in the comparison trap.
When we compare ourselves to others, this can result in some serious discouragement. We end up getting frustrated about how far we have to go, rather than feeling a sense of accomplishment for the progress that we’ve made.
Here are 3 ways to stop comparing yourself to others, so you can fully focus on your growth journey:
1. Follow people who spark inspiration, not jealousy.
Take a good, hard look at who you’re following on social media. There’s nothing wrong with following people you admire, but it’s important to focus on the way they make you feel.
Are they inspiring you to grow, or are they diminishing your confidence?
When people make you feel “behind,” it’s not inspirational – it’s toxic. If your feed isn’t “sparking joy” a la Marie Kondo, don’t be afraid to do a little purging.
Ditch the Insta-influencers who make you feel shitty about yourself, and replace them with people who actually motivate you to take action.
Start staying up-to-date with people who share valuable insight and stories that spark excitement in your own business.
If you're not sure where to find feel-good inspiration, check out Chrissy Weems and her business success.
2. Track your growth, and stay conscious of it.
When you catch yourself focusing too heavily on others’ journeys, bring your attention back to yourself.
When I first started taking my writing seriously, I made the mistake of fixating too heavily on my next step.
I was stuck in a constant state of imposter syndrome, as I worried about my “level” of success and how long it would last.
Now, I track my accomplishments just as often as I track my to-do’s. This includes quantitative values such as my blog metrics, and qualitative factors like helping someone gain confidence through my words.
Any new venture is bound to present challenges and frustrations, but growth-tracking can help you remain forward-thinking and positive.
3. Take social media breaks.
This isn’t groundbreaking news, but too much scrolling will put you in the danger zone.
While giving up social media entirely is probably unrealistic, try being more purposeful in how you use it.
For instance, I use several social channels as branding tools to promote my blog. Therefore, my time on social is primarily spent sharing images and messaging that support my new content.
Of course, I also enjoy trolling my friends with memes and engaging with like-minded individuals.
As for straight-up lurking time? Almost non-existent.
The old me would waste time Facebook-stalking exes, or mindlessly scroll through engagement photos of someone I hadn’t talked to since I was 16.
Now knowing that social media is a critical component of my business, I try to use my time as productively as possible.
If you find yourself in lurker-mode, put some effort into separating yourself from the screen. Try opening an actual book, or calling your mom on the phone.
In our ever-connected world, we’re in a constant state of pressure to always be “plugged in.” But sometimes, the best way to improve your mindset is letting yourself tune out.
16 Comments Add a Comment?
Emily Adams
Posted on Feb. 4, 2019, 1:22 p.m.
These are such great tips. I waste so much time on social media and almost always end up unhappy after doing so. I'm working on creating more specific goals for myself each month as it seems much more rewarding when you see what you've achieved.
Katy Malkin
Posted on Feb. 4, 2019, 1:39 p.m.
YES! To all 3. I need to do more social media breaks. Hard when you have a business and are part of a paid mastermind.
Beth
Posted on Feb. 4, 2019, 2:20 p.m.
These are all really great tips. It's so easy to get caught up in the trap of comparison, and so important to remember that you're only seeing the highlights of people's lives online. Thanks for the advice!
Margaret
Posted on Feb. 4, 2019, 3:09 p.m.
Excellent suggestions. I waste so much time on social media and never thought of it as comparing myself to others. Thanks for the insight. I can add it to the list of reasons on why I am moving away from Facebook. Here is more about my New Years resolution about FB
Tracking your growth is so important!
Emily
Posted on Feb. 4, 2019, 5:49 p.m.
These are great tips! I’ve definitely felt imposter syndrome so I’ll have to try tracking my accomplishments more.
Ashley Sugimoto
Posted on Feb. 5, 2019, 6:57 a.m.
Yaaaas #1! It's important not to ignore the signs of feeling less-than. Great read!
Anaïs
Posted on Feb. 5, 2019, 7:36 a.m.
Such an interesting and helpful post!!! I'm sure it'll help more than 1 person, myself include so thanks a lot for sharing xx
Anaïs |
Michael
Posted on Feb. 5, 2019, 11:06 a.m.
Very insightful and interesting! We could all learn something from these tips! I'm very big on the first two, but always fail at the last one! Although that is how I found your blog so... :)
Jen Littler
Posted on Feb. 5, 2019, 11:18 a.m.
Comparing oneself to others is never helpful, but we all do it! Great tips about how to bring focus back to our own lives. Your journey is no one else's and we should only care about how we feel about our lives, not how others may perceive it.
Jumpstart Positivity
Posted on Feb. 5, 2019, 4:35 p.m.
This is such great advice! We totally agree. We only follow people who inspire and motivate us. We keep our social media feeds full of positivity and take breaks when we need to. Thanks for sharing!
Abby | theMomCorner
Posted on Feb. 5, 2019, 4:50 p.m.
Great tips! I know moms can also get caught up in the comparison game. As can everyone, of course. Sometimes it's definitely necessary to do some online purging!
Jo Tea & Cake for the Soul
Posted on Feb. 5, 2019, 8:15 p.m.
Great post, we do put ourselves through the mill don't we and this is a great reminder of how to deal with it.
Lara Syrvart
Posted on Feb. 5, 2019, 10:05 p.m.
excellent points! we have to think about what we're thinking about. whatever we focus on, whether its comparison or negative thoughts, that's all we'll attract!
cheers, Sara!
Lauren
Posted on Feb. 6, 2019, 10:56 a.m.
These are great tips! It’s so important to actually love and enjoy the work you’re doing rather than beat yourself up because you aren’t matching others, especially if you’re still getting started! X
Renae
Posted on Feb. 6, 2019, 8:02 p.m.
These are great tips and “trolling my friends with memes” had me laughing!!!
Christina Anderson
Posted on Feb. 6, 2019, 10:17 p.m.
As soon as you said spark joy, Immediately thought of Marie Kondo. This post speaks to the entire vibe of my blog, and just not being influenced by outside like social media. I can all be a bit much if you let it consume you. This is a good read if you need to know how to take a step back and get some fresh air.